yikes and oi

manhattan's make my head hurt. wish i could visit the wrestling mats today.

many errands to run. can't lift...wet blanket...off brain...

shrimp remind me of seahorses. can't eat em.

i think i like living in squalor.

i need a new pt yob.
you should see the fruitloops @ the brothel. some can't spell, some are flakey, some like silly songs and have poor rationales for doing so.

and i quote:

this song captivated me for the longest time at the store. I also thought it was a woman singing, and I was struck by the raw emotion...being a Scorpio I am easily pulled in by raw emotion. So I found the song and went out and bought the whole album. I love it. It's such a beautiful song, and I am also very impressed that a man is singing to the moon, which is typically not a masculine symbol. I like men who are evolved into whole beings, meaning they accept that they embody feminine qualities without fighting them, which is why macho behavior is such a turnoff to me. It signals weakness and fear. So I like this Jason Mraz, because he is celebrating the moon in a very affectionate way for how it makes him feel.

princess bitch

i sit here, whining like a lil bitch, i'm so tired, school is so hard, my train was three hours late, i had to find a taxi @ 2 a.m., my head hurts, i'm hungry, i'm confused, my lips are chapped....

shut the FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF up!!!!

yesterday amtrak was three hrs delayed b/c someone committed suicide in front of the nicey train.

i heard the story of the two kids who died in a car accident last nt in hopkinton (and secretly feared one was db's lil sis) and felt sad. lil did i know they're my classmates kids!! one of the nicest ppl i've ever met has just lost his family.

how the hell can i complain about my skim milk going sour before the expiration date?

sorry, folks...you'll have to wait a day or two before i spew more nonsense forth from my curse-laden lips.

engulfed in drama dot com(ma)

besides the desire to have a gun strapped to my boot and a pen chant for punching, i like to think that i wish to live a stable, steady, somewhat serene life. yet i'm always gettin myself into some sort of trouble. if it ain't contractors, sellers, lawyers, professors or cohorts that are making my blood boil and my milk curdle...then it's men.

damn the drama. where's the calm(a)?

i like ryhmes.

i also like overeating and wandering the aisles of pricey groceries in desperation for a sign from the ice cream section.

well, i gots me gun school, bitches.

enter to win here! drama w/ me. free! the stories you'll tell. priceless

green spleen

today was a big day for me. i managed to share some of my innermost thoughts w/ ppl i am close to. granted, i did it all through email. but still, this is a nicey move for moi.

so now i get to sit here and stew and wonder if the shite i shared was perceived as intended, if i've made someone cringe, if there will be a new market for voodoo dolls of me.

tis St. Patrick's Day and i'm beat! i need to get my mickey pants on and roll with the slurred punches. i need to stand atop a table and sing umm...what shall i sing? oh fekk it, i need a nap.

blame it on the rain, milli.

gosh, sometimes do you get that nauseated feeling in yer stomach but yer not sure why? something's gone amiss in yer wee head- but what can it be? i feel like my attempts @ being a decent person are only going to backfire against me...and there i'll be, sittin on the curb-confused as hell, waiting for someone to find me and be my smail. what the hell is naggin me? napoleon- will i ever know?

so i had a dream last nt that the ppl i babysit for told me i had to "get clean" before i could watch their youngins again. hah! then again, i also had a dream that my senior citizen dorm had a party w/ pink cake and didn't invite me. they were v mean and dubious about it.

i trust less and less by the day. i think i might love less too. soon i will be cat lady hermit cave girl.

i blame it partially on the cock n brothel. partially on the general population.

let it all hang out

so i was chillin in the management library yesterday- lookin @ books n stuff. and i had to pee, yo. so i went to the loo and when i pulled up my skirt i realized i was wearing skippies that db had given me. i was annoyed at the butterfly thong and all it represented. so i took it off and left it in the stall. it was quite refreshing, literally. :P

i had the urge to purge. i would've set em aflame if i a) had more passion for the subject and b) wouldn't get yelled @ by librarians.

anyway...just wanted to share.

things that make you go 'ewww...'

so, i'm @ work, but my tele's broken- so i can't communicate effectively w/ the outside world- the sane world!

you thought once i got 5g's from my seller that i'd stop whining, right? WRONG. there's just so much to complain about and so little fulfillment in the work and school environs i frequent. i know, i know...you too. i feel yer pain, baby.

so, i was in a meeting this morning and my coworker's breath reminded me of that of the first guy i ever "dated". i was 15, he was 16, his name was Toby something. i didn't like him, but i didn't dislike him, and i felt like a girl was sposed to "date" (thanks to sweet fekkin valley high books) so i did. we went to the movies and he tried to hold my hand- but his was sweaty. ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. then later he drove us to a parking lot by the harbor and tried to make out w/ me. ewww. and i didn't like the smell of his breath. eww ewwww (that's a double ewww). it was rank, but it wasn't very 'come fekkin hither' either.

needless to say, he didn't make it v far w/ me. but off he went to college- and wrote me poems that i never cared about or for. i think he's the reason i have a history of some serious intimacy issues. well, a piece of the ewww puzzle.

sometimes sarah mclachlin makes me want to cry. am i a pussy or what?
well, off to shoot me some guns.